Black Roses Red
by HanyouRyo
Summary: This is just a songfic I wrote for These Holy Yet Demonic Eyes. It takes place sometime inbetween the fourth and fifth chapter.


_**Konnichiwa! I made this short songfic for mystory "The Fallen Angel" and is told in Mayumi's point of view. If you don't read the fic, you won't get it. Also this is my first attempt at a songfic so it might suck. Please review! Also, this would be better if you read and listened to the actual song at the same time.**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki, nor do I own the song. Minekuwa-sama owns Saiyuki and Alana Grace owns "Black Roses Red"**

_Past Memories_

Thoughts

"Speech"

**Song**

_**Sayonara Kobayashi!**_

* * *

Mayumi sat down in her room, looking out at the window that was near her. The rain was falling steadily and the moon seemed to outshine it tonight. It brought back so many memories... 

**Can I ask you a question please?  
Promise you won't laugh at me  
Honestly, I'm standing here  
Afraid I'll be betrayed **

_"Kyo-chan! Stop that! The monks will be angry at you!" she yelled at her little brother. It was raining outside and he was messing around with sacred objects. The small girl ran out in the pouring rain, stopping him from messing anything up. "Aww! C'mon! I was just havin' fun sis!" he complained. She sighed and smiled at him in all her innocence._

_"Okay, but you have to promise you won't upset sensei" she said. He pouted and blew away the wet brownish bangs over his eyes. Both of them were soaked but didn't seem to care. In the shadows, the two children didn't know that the head priest was watching them with loathing eyes. The offspring of a servant and a fellow monk. More like a whore and a forbidden holy man in his opinion._

**As twisted as it seems  
I only fear love when it's in my dreams  
So let in the morning light and let the darkness fade away **

"Sanzo..." she said silenty and cursed herself for thinking of him. Had his own past been like this? But was it as she feared and probed his mind and seen bloody images. He was like a light in her life, he promised he would try his best not to hurt her. Like the vision...but it didn't seem that was happening. Did she love him?

**Can you turn my black roses red?  
Can you turn my black roses red?**

Then she pictured him holding her, like in her dreams. But fear...it held her back. His touch was warm but her heart was cold. It was like ice. She didn't want that...she wanted him to help her. To make her be complete again, to melt the ice away.

**Drowning in my loneliness  
How long must I hold my breath?  
So much emptiness inside  
I could fill the deepest sea **

_"NO! Oka-san! Kyo-kun!" she yelled running to the burning temple. The Sanzo priest with her had tried to hold her back but she bit and kicked at him until he let her go. She ran up the stairs, nearly out of breath from the excersion. All she could see were monks running away, trying not to get killed. But she stayed, looking around for her family. But what she found, she certainly didn't like..._**  
**

"Why...?" Mayumi asked herself standing now, looking outside at the falling rain.

She hated it...it was raining that day too but it seemed to do nothing to stop the blazing fire set by demons.

**I reach to the sky as the moon looks on  
My one last tear has come and gone**  
**I'm dying to let your love rain down on me **

_They were there...but they weren't alive for shit. They had been torn apart by the demons...ripped by metal weapons. She stood over thier lifeless bodies, unaware of the spreading fire coming to the room. But she didn't care...nothing mattered anymore. Kyo and Mama were gone...and there was nothing she could do about it. _

_"Lady Chiharu! Come out of there!" the Sanzo priest said behind her. _

_She let the tears run down her face, as if those would bring back the people who loved her. _

**Can you turn my black roses red?  
Can you turn my black roses red?  
Can you turn my black roses red? **

Was it my fault? Was it because I was forbidden to learn the teachings and they wanted the sutra I guard now?

No, it was a matter of the berserk demons and thatI have to stop them. So I set out on my journey to get all the sutras and protect them and use thier power.

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love  
Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love  
Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love**

"Sanzo? Do you love me?" she asked to the rain.

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love**

I need you to be there for me.

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love**

Love is my weakness, too much so.

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love**

And she wanted it...she craved it. To be loved by someone other than her teacher, her dead family. She wanted Sanzo to love her, to have the same feelings she did for him. The same feelings of love that she had been harboring for months now.

**Can you turn my black roses red?  
Can you turn my black roses red?  
Can you turn my black roses red?**

She picked up a red rose and stared at it for the longest and held it to her heart as she thought of her past, her present, and her future.

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love**

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love**

**Cause I feelin' like I'm living on love...**

* * *


End file.
